dumped

i mentioned in a previous post that i got the 4th generation ipod, and that my favorite feature on it is the camera/video function. of course, another perk to this is all the rad photo apps i get to now download and use. my current favorite is instagram. not only is it totally free, but it makes me look like the suavest photographer that was ever invented. these past couple of days a buttload of snow has been dumped on seattle and the immediate areas so i thought i'd seize the opportunity to take some pictures to share with you!

the night of the snowfall,outside my house...

dude,where's my car???


the next morning...


walking into work


snow angel


our big yard



(if you think the red house looks like a dog house you are correct. that's where we put all the naughty children when they don't behave)




(j/k)


my two favorite bebe's <3


when i was still recovering from surgery my sweet coteacher brought me coffee and a red velvet cupcake. my fav. (co-teacher and treats)


drive safe out there everyone!! have a great weekend! :)

hell hath no fury like a woman scorned

in general, i avoid talking about personal matters on here, but something happened to me recently in my dating life that really got under my skin. i don't like the fact that this is still bugging me, so i'm hoping that writing about it will help get it out of my system...

so i had gone out with this guy,"brad" a few times. let me tell you a little bit about brad. he was a super sweet guy but he was very materialistic. he wouldn't think twice to drop $500 on two t-shirts or the same amount on a bottle of vodka. one day brad gets wasted off his ass and declares to me(and this is a direct quote)"i can't be with a teacher." as in, teachers don't make enough money for his liking.

wooooooow.unbelievable.

i ask him about it the next day and he apologizes and says that profession doesn't matter, but i was done. the second he said those words i had lost every ounce of respect for him. for that thought to even enter his head, let alone say it out loud, there had to be some merit of truth to it. peace out brad.

i've worked a lot of jobs in different industries. i did retail for a while, food, and eventually ended up in childcare. when i got hired as a preschool teacher for the first time in my life i was proud to say what i do as a profession. i'm a teacher. i help mold young minds and teach them basic essentials to life that they will remember and use for the rest of their life. how exactly are you changing the world doing math problems and sitting in your cubicle for 8 hours a day? what right do you have to degrade me and judge me based on the fact i'm a teacher,like it's a bad thing?? i don't judge you because you are so wasteful with your money. did you teach yourself how to add and subtract? negative.

i just also have a hard time wrapping my mind around the fact that someone could be that superficial. you make enough money for the both of us and a small army, why does it matter to you how much i make? i do alright. i'm able to pay rent and bills and life's necessities. i can go on trips and buy things i want. i have clothes that i can lounge around the house in as well as clothes that could be worn at a five star restaurant. why does it matter how much they cost? if my paycheck doesn't bug me, it sure as hell shouldn't bug you.

disbelief is a good word for how i feel about this whole situation i guess. congrats, brad, you are the biggest douchebag i've ever met. next time you cash your paycheck, thank a teacher.

word nerd

i'm fascinated by words. i love how you can take letters to form a word. combine words together and you've got a sentence. combine a few sentences together and you've got a paragraph. i love how words can speak to multiple people at one time. you read a quote or listen to song lyrics and it's like that person knows you and your situation and wrote that quote or those lyrics just for you. it's also amazing to me how you can hear a song a million times, even know all the words, but then you experience something in your life and the song takes on a whole new meaning, or you finally understand what the singer is singing about.

i have a friend who gave me this quote a while back. i've been wanting to post it for a while but not quite sure how to fit it into anything. i suppose i should have placed it in my valentine's post, but now is a good time as any. so, here, i share some of my favorite letters that make sentences that have formed a paragraph that i love because it is so so true.

"We all have the potential to fall in love a thousand times in our lifetime. It's easy. The first girl I ever loved was someone I knew in sixth grade. Her name was Missy; we talked about horses. The last girl I love will be someone I haven't even met yet, probably. They all count. But there are certain people you love who do something else; they define how you classify what love is supposed to feel like. These are the most important people in your life, and you’ll meet maybe four or five of these people over the span of 80 years. But there’s still one more tier to all this; there is always one person you love who becomes that definition. It usually happens retrospectively, but it happens eventually. This is the person who unknowingly sets the template for what you will always love about other people, even if some of these loveable qualities are self-destructive and unreasonable. The person who defines your understanding of love is not inherently different than anyone else, and they’re often just the person you happen to meet the first time you really, really, want to love someone. But that person still wins. They win, and you lose. Because for the rest of your life, they will control how you feel about everyone else."
— Chuck Klosterman (Killing Yourself to Live: 85% of a True Story)

gumbo

i'm calling this my gumbo post just because it's going to be a few random things i wanted to share:

so probably my biggest thing is that i am now the proud owner of a laptop for the first time EVER. i've posted this on pretty much every social networking site i'm on so i'm clearly over the top super duper ridiculous over the moon about this. for the past eight years i've been using a desktop by dad built for me my first year of college(which is really a testament to how well he built it-it lasted eight years!). it's still technically functional, it's just sooooooo sloooooooooooooow. i'm enrolled in an online university that requires me to view multipage adobe documents that my desktop just could not open. since i need to be able to do my homework, and my time with my beloved computer had ran it's course, i decided to treat myself to a little upgrade. it's nothing fancy. it's a middle of the line toshiba something or other. but it can open (multiple!)programs in under ten minutes, it doesn't constantly disconnect from the internet, need to be restarted, or randomly restart itself, and, most importantly, it can open my multipage adobe documents with the greatest of ease.my favorite part,though is probably the sweet bag i got for it. it looks more like a big purse instead of a bag and it holds anything i could ever need and will be wonderful on trips. i am a happy girl.


did you guys watch the grammys?? i wasn't able to, but i saw some great performances online! i think i've mentioned before how much i love bruno mars. like, LOVE. he could sing the nutrition contents on the side of a box of cereal and my heart would melt all over the floor. and it's because he does performances this this:

(feel free to skip ahead to about the 2:10 mark)


another great performance i saw was the cee lo green/gwenyth paltrow verson of "forget you". i have no radio in my life so this was actually my first time hearing this song. it was love at first listen, i can't get it out of my head!



in other music news, this is a beautiful and sad song that i have fallen in love with and am completely devastated i can't find it on itunes. i neeed this on my ipod!:


speaking of ipods-i've purchased the 4th generation ipod touch. i didn't think it was going to make a huge difference in my life since i've had the 2nd generation ipod touch for a couple of years now. but holy. crap. WHAT a difference! not only is the screen clarity like 239872% better, but just the added video/camera option alone is enough to keep me entertained for days.

oh yeah, as a warning-now that i have all these cool electronic new toys that include webcams, video, and cameras-you will definitely be seeing more posts from me and most likely more vlogs too. i think the only people that will appreciate the vlog uppage is my grandparents haha

random question: is there anyone that can explain to me the purpose of apple only allowing five computer authorizations per account?? i might be in trouble-my new comp was my fifth authorization, and i have no clue where the other four are.

i leave you know with some pictures of two kids i randomly found on the internet:

random beautiful baby girl(outfit provided by some random aunt of hers)


random baby girl with random growth on her forehead:



random handsome little boy playing in his new backyard:




sweet little random baby feet:


alright loveys, enough blogcitement for tonight. time for me to sleep and hopefully NOT wake up at 4 am...wish me luck!

done and done

as most of you probably know, i had back surgery last week. some of you may not know, that you cannot have surgery if you are sick(cold,swine flu,cough,whatevs). i have the immune system of an ox so i've been able to avoid getting sick this whole season. so of COURSE the week before my surgery, not only is literally everyone in my life sick(including those in my own house)but my throat is feeling awfully scratchy. there was absolutely no way i was postponing my surgery so i took every precautionary measure possible in order to ensure my scratchy throat didn't turn into anything else and peaced out of my life asap. the first thing i did was tell my sick friends(and this may or may not be a direct quote)"sooooo...just so you know, we can't be friends this week. but i would be happy to continue this friendship when i return to work after my surgery".i also consumed disgusting amounts of vitamin c and emergen-c in order to maintain my ox strength immune system status.

i spent nearly the entire week avoiding the general public as well as the sickness in my house which means i spent a LOT of time watching movies and seasons of friends in my bedroom. i also worked a ton on my recipe box,which had been pretty neglected since...well...since i decided i wanted to start a recipe box.

all set up and ready to do work!


oh i forgot to mention that the kids that i teach have the sweetest parents. a couple of them sent me home with flowers on my last day of work before my surgery:

cute potted plant:


beautiful bouquet:


so sweet.

my surgery was on a monday, so i used saturday as a "live it up" night, since i knew nothing would be lived up for a while after the surgery. as i mentioned before, i was avoiding the general public so my last hurrah had to take place at my house. are you prepared to see the biggest house party of your life??

me, chillin with a glass of wine, catching up on my jersey shore:


i'm outta control.

i have to add this picture for good measure.(i heart pauly d)



my parents are the best in the west so they said they would be able to take care of me until i was able to get back on my feet. i stayed at their house the night before, woke up bright and early monday morning, and me and my mom were off to lakewood surgery center so i could get sliced open. unfortunately the camera i was using decided to malfunction, so as much as i wanted to take a video of me saying funny things while coming out of sedation in order to post it on youtube so that i may become an overnight internet sensation-i was unable. oh well. maybe next time?

the day of the surgery i was able to walk a little, but it was super painful so i did very minimal moving and maximal sleeping. serious. i think i slept 21 hours of the day. it helped that my parents guest bed is like heaven wrapped in clouds on top of marshmallows and cotton balls. SO comfy. anyway, i digress...

this was the extent of my view for four days:

to my left, a tv with dvd and dvds brought from home. i thought i would spend hours of my time watching said dvd's but my high doses of pain killers the first few days made it impossible for me to keep my eyes open for more than 12 minutes:


straight ahead, a huge window with a great view of the sky. sunsets were especially beautiful to see from here:



and to my right, a dresser of some sorts, topped with the beautiful flowers my grandma<3 had sent to me:




when i wasn't sleeping i was crazy busy playing cooking games on my ipod, surfing the interwebs on my ipod, texting, or reading my book. by my side was also fresh fruit for when i got hungry and my glasses, in case i ever wanted to see something far,far away.(not pictured, the bag of jelly beans my mom snuck me in case i got tired of eating fresh fruit):


on thursday my most precious friend megan came to visit me with her most precious babies. i was especially excited for her to visit because i had never met her littest bebe audrey, who was born 4 months ago. and also, because she brought food! megs is a great cook and had made delish toquitos which me and my mom gladly scarfed down.

SO yummy!(toquito, with a side of corn nuts imported from texas)


thanks again for the visit,meg<3!


i was well enough to slowly and carefully function on my own by thursday so i went home that night. each day i have been gradually feeling better. i had my follow up appt yesterday and my doc gave me the ok to return to work, which was great because i was getting cabin fever like whoa. so today-fri i'm working a half day,then will return to full time on monday. i'm moving around pretty ok but i have to remember that i am still healing and to slow down a little bit just to make sure i don't re-injure myself. i also still have some pain but the doc expects that won't go away for another 6-8 weeks. so i really won't know if the surgery was completely successful until then. crossed fingers!

i just wanted to thank everyone for their well wishes and support, especially work for being so accommodating to me taking the time off i need, and my mom for taking days off of work to make sure i was properly cared for. i am the luckiest.


p.s. i was watching "my strange addiction" while typing this. there's a girl who takes 150 laxative pills a day, and another girl who eats pottery and cigarette ashes. seriously disturbed.

optimistic

To the love of my life,

"even though i haven't found you yet, i take comfort in knowing you haven't found me either. be patient."-unknown

Love always,
Andi <3

an open letter

over christmas break the daughter of one of my co-workers tragically died in a car accident.(you can read about it by clicking the link) i didn't know the daughter but i attended her funeral to show support for her mom. six weeks later, i wrote her mom this letter:

i noticed you gave your email address with no hesitation last
sunday...that was very brave of you considering you had no idea what
it was i wanted to send you :) i've actually been wanting to write you
for a couple of months now. i have a story that i'd like to share with
you that i think you'll really like and that i felt you really needed
to hear....

i was in houston when i got the text that your daughter shelby had
been in a car accident and had not survived. i saw the memorial was
going to be after i was back home and i immediately decided that i
wanted to go to show my support to you. we didn't talk a whole lot and
i didn't know a whole lot about you-i didn't know your family at all-
but i really like you and feel you are a real,genuine person and
wanted to be there for you in any way i could, even if it meant just
attending shelby's funeral service.

the day of the service i'm not sure what happened,i got cold feet or
something but i told schimere that i had decided not to go. my excuse
was that it would be weird considering i didn't really know you, and i
didn't want to intrude on such a personal night. schimere insisted
that i HAD to go. she said tons of people from the center will be
there and that i should just do it. so...i went.

i arrived and was instantly in awe at the vast amounts of people who
were there. not just people Shelby's age, but people of EVERY age,
celebrating the life of this one girl. it was like i could instantly
see the impact she and your family have had on all these people. no
one even had to say a word. just one look around the room and it was
very obvious. i took my seat with the rest of the women from our
center and prepared myself to hear about Shelby's life.

before i go any further, i think i need to tell you the history of me
and church. i grew up in a christian household. during my high school
years it wasn't weird to see me at church up to three times a week
doing various youth activities. i also went on all the field trips i
could. in fact, i didn't have very many friends at my actual high
school. about 95% of my good memories of those years relate to things
i did in church with my church friends. that was also a point in my
life where i was still doing what people told me to do.and i did it in
order to fit in and be accepted. luckily, because i was so easily
influenced i was hanging around good people. church and parents told
me how to act, what i should be reading, what i should say at certain
times,etc. though i attended church numerous times a week, it wasn't
really "me". my heart wasn't in it, i just did it to fit in. so once
i left for college i flipped a complete 180...

this wasn't an instantaneous flip, it was gradual, over time. but
there was a definite change. i never started doing drugs or robbing
stores but i did come to the realization that i didn't have to do what
other people told me to do and i didn't have to believe what other
people told me to believe. this revelation left me feeling free and
excited. i wasn't sure what to do with this newfound "freedom". so i
started hanging out with people who had discovered their freedom way
before i had and could teach me their ways of not giving a crap about
what other people said and just doing your own thing. there was one
problem with this,though. these people didn't have my best interests
at heart. i was constantly being taken advantage of and my life just
started going in a downward spiral.

it wasn't until about 3 years ago i realized i needed a change. i
wasn't sure what to do because it's not like i was a bad person, i
just periodically made bad decisions that had big and negative impacts
on my life and others around me. i didn't want to hurt anymore and i
didn't want to hurt anyone else either. slowly but surely i've been
working things out, getting my mind and life back on a path i am proud
of. but so far-none of this has included church.

the night of shelby's funeral the people who got up to talk about her
were constantly stressing on how easy it was for her to forgive
people. how people wouldn't even have to apologize because she had
already forgiven them. because of my bad choices in the past there are
a lot of people who i felt have hurt me and i am pretty good at
forgiving-but i never forget. i still hold on to those feelings of
being wronged. carrying around these feelings, i have realized does no
good for anyone. i only weighs me down and is the other person even
worried about how i feel about them? chances are, they don't even
think twice about it. shelby lived her life so carefree and full of
love for EVERYONE. i can't let life experiences and interactions with
other people get in the way of me doing that. i want to live like that
and i want people to see me living like that and be inspired too.

after the service i wanted to let you know so badly that i was there
and what i had learned but i was completely weirded out and confused
by how i was feeling. it was too much of a coincidence to me that not
only am i one of the most anti-going-to-church people i know, but i
attended a funeral that i initially was going to skip, and actually
felt and learned something while i was there-all because of this
beautiful 17 year old girl.

as you know, since then i've been going pretty regularly to new life.
one reason why i chose to start attending services specifically at new
life is because i don't feel like they are brainwashing me or trying
to force me to do something i don't want to do. i have a few different
beliefs than what the bible says, but i feel that i can freely voice
my opinion and not feel ridiculed or looked down on. i'm not saying
that i'm going to become a bible reading, care group attending,
jesusfreak (I mean that in the nicest was possible :) but i am
interested just to learn not just what i need to do to be a better
person, but HOW to do it, as well as the history of the bible and the
interesting stories it has to tell. i feel now is a good time because
it is on MY terms, it is strictly MY decision to go. i'm not doing it
to fit in to a crowd or because someone is telling me that i should. i
just want to learn. so thank you, carol, for raising such an amazing
daughter. i'm just sad i never got the chance to know her in real life
but from what i can tell she was a pretty special girl. :)